Of Ramadhan, Self Restraint & Rezeki

Some people just don't know the meaning of self restraint and regard for other people's feelings. I would've thought that in this blessed month of Ramadhan, we are encouraged to exercise self restraint in all aspects of our daily life.

It was just recently that my colleague and I have been discussing and somewhat praising this person, who we shall refer to as Sharif Dol - Gangster Kampung Dusun, for his unusual self restraint during Ramadhan. For the first 3 weeks of Ramadhan, Sharif Dol somehow did not bite people's head off, scream and scold at people unnecessarily (well, at least not at me), make cynical snide remarks about our work, ask us to do unnecessary stuff and other annoying things.

However, yesterday, on the last day of work before we all take our Aidilfitri holidays, we were proved wrong - that old habits die hard. Sharif Dol, struck after a 3 weeks hiatus. He basically crashed into my room and loudly said in front of 2 of my colleagues: "You ni PEMALAS! I suruh you call mamat tuh, you suruh Chombi pulak" (bukan nama sebenar). "Now I want you to call mamat tuh sekarang and pass the line to me!" Sharif Dol then left...

There was an eerie silence in my room. As if a tornado just struck leaving behind its wreckage. Everybody in the room were flabbergasted!!! Shocked to the shell! I was left dumbfounded. I just didnt bother to retaliate although I usually reply or relataliate for such unnecessary outbursts from Sharif Dol.

The story goes like this: Sharif Dol earlier asked me to find the number of a certain mamat and asked me to call this mamat (since when I am his secretary?). Since I did not have the person's number, I went to see Chombi (bukan nama sebenar)as she would keep this mamat's name card (which was given earlier to Sharif Dol). Since I was at Chombi's place (bukan nama sebenar), I said can you help me to call this mamat and pass it to Sharif Dol. Being colleagues, she said ok, as she normally does numerous times before. And then suddenly, about an hour later Sharif Dol struck at my room.... He basically accused me that I was lazy and passed the job to Chombi, when I was supposed to do it myself!

I was severely dissappointed with his latest antic, even though I was not surprised of his capability of being extremely brutal & blunt. I was dissappointed that he chose to scold and humiliate me in front of 2 junior colleagues, made a extremely insulting remark that I was PEMALAS. Implying that I was incompetent in front of the two. My pride was shattered for a while...

Luckily the 2 colleagues understood. They both knew the unreasonableness and brutal capabilities of Sharif Dol. It was an unnecessary. The thing he asked me to do could have also been done by Chombi. It made no difference whether I made the call or Chombi did. In fact Chombi volunteered to help me. In then end, when I did get the mamat's number, he wanted it to be made at my place using my phone (as if he doesnt have a phone )to be passed to him.I just couldn't figure out the reasoning behind such move. After talking with the mamat, he didnt have the courtesy to even say thanks to me for making the call. He just said - "Ok, now you make sure you follow up after this!"... and left my room.

Well, enough said... This latest antic of his further solidified my resolution in moving forward with my exit plans... Sharif Dol is simply incorrigible. I have had enough of his antics and bad temperament. I do not deserve to be treated like this. It just stunts my personal career development, as I had observed with some of the senior managers here. His word is the law, comply with it. You are either with him or against him. That arbitrariness is the order of the day and dissent is not tolerated. There is no more creativity and freedom to make decisions around here. Everything is subjected to his law, and no other.

For me, I always believe in rezeki and that there are always better options out there. All I can say at this moment is my plans seem to be in place. I was surprised at the speed of the developments that have been happening for the past 3 weeks since the start of Ramadhan. 3 interviews within the span of 3 weeks, 2 confirmed job applications. Maybe, this was fated by the Almighty in this blessed month of Ramadhan. Maybe this is the answer to me & my wife's prayer for a better future for our family.

I expect to hear something from the other side after Raya (Plan A), as they had promised. After all, I have completed all 3 stages of the long and tedious interview process. If that doesn't happen or the offer is less favourable, then I may resort to Plan B which also seems to be in place. They have called me last week and I told them I need more time as I am also applying for another place. The person indicated to me that its my choice but they will have to decide soon. I told them I understood their predicaments and will indicate to them whether I am interested or not 2 weeks after Raya.

Meanwhile, I have already prepared the points for farewell speech, all kept safely at the back of my mind...

Ihsan...



This is Ihsan, my youngest child. He's 10 months old now, already learning to stand on his own two feet. Getting very active by the day, crawling all over the place when he is awake. Even when everyone else is asleep at night, he would play on his own in the dark. Then, he would cry to get attention from his parents. His tired mother would then just gave him milk, with a hope that he will fall asleep. Sometimes he goes to sleep, sometimes he goes crawling around again and plays chak chak with his dad, to his mother's ire.

It just soothes my heart when he greets me at the door whenever I got home from work. He would start to try to wriggle himself from the arms of my wife or bibik, and extend his body and arms, asking me to hug and hold him. I obliged all the time and would be warmly greeted with his glee and smile. It just sooths my heart and my mind by holding him and playing with him. All the agony from the 1 hour traffic jam that I had to endure going home and all the troubles in the office are somewhat forgotten...

Freedom....

At last.... I finally finished my last academic chore today, a group assignment for my statistics course. I am fortunate to have excellent group mates who each diligently contributed in finishing it. Its not something easy to do when all of us are busy working people. To brother Zul (KDEB), Bro Fizri (Redmax Corp) and Bro Othman (RTM), my utmost gratitude. Hopefully Bro Fizri who left for Umrah yesterday will remember to pray for us all in front of Baitullah. I also indebted to my sister Izzah for helping my complete my stats assignments.. ;) Without her, I wouldn't have managed to get good marks for my individual assignments... That goes to show that with teamwork, difficult things become easy as the burden is shared....

Anyway, my last paper (Statistics) was last Saturday. Thank Allah Almighty as I managed to answer most of the questions. Not an easy thing to do for a law graduate who used to shun math related subjects (which was why I took up law in the first place!). Anyway, I think stats is actually an interesting subject (with the right lecturer, tutor and practice). As for the other paper, I am pretty confident of my chances since it was a qualitative subject (reading subject). Me like those!!!

In my current situation, I'm not expecting much... Just hope to pass and maintain my current CGPA. Finally, my mind is "free"!! No worries about classes, assignments, presentations for the next 3 weeks, albeit a short one! Thereafter, my last semester will commence. I can't wait to finish my masters and graduate next year!

Its time to crack my brain again!

This week and next week will be very very hectic. For my brain that is... I have to sit for 2 final exams this semester, the 1st being the Strategic Management paper this Saturday (7 Oct 06) at 2pm and the 2nd paper, Quantitative Decision Making (not my favourite subject!) the following Saturday at 2pm. Wish me luck people as I really need it. Have not had time to really sit down and read thoroughly. I suppose I will have to have my "cooking utensils" handy to "cook up" a good answer but I doubt I can do so for QDM as its a math subject. Yes, its math.... and I thot I could get away from math related subjects....

Then there is the 2nd interview next week which I have to attend. It was a pleasant surprise when the HR staff called me yesterday afternoon. Didnt expect it to be so soon as they had indicated that they'd call me after Raya. Need to prepare for that one too. I really hope and pray that I will get this one as I've always wanted to join this company.

I've also gotten calls from a job hunter but I am not so keen on that (some obscure telco company). Dont think I want to be in that industry though. And then there is the option of retreating into the academic world as a lecturer, something which my father has persistently encouraged me to do since I graduated. Perhaps to follow his footstep. My alma mater called me up few days back asking me to fill up their application form and submit a.s.a.p. It seems that my CV did get through to the Dean. But now I am not sure whether I really want to become an academic at this point of time in my life, eventhough at the back of my mind, I would want to teach one fine day when I have enough knowledge and experience. I feel that I still have the energy and motivation to remain in the hustle and bustle of corporate world. At least for the next 5 years.

My exit plan seems to be in place so far. Man proposes, God disposes...